I always wait until it’s an emergency and that’s a bad thing.
Today and yesterday were rough ones. I’m not going to pretend that things are always sunshine and roses in our household. The minis were up before 6am for no logical reason. All 3 minis just up and moving around in the dark talking and asking if they can play toys. There is nothing about them that says “I’ll just lay here until I hear someone moving around.” If Mini-Sir wakes up and nobody else is up, he is waking ALL of us up. That is horrible because I’m a sleeper. But parenting has changed all that. Anyway, we digress. They all had random attitudes—crying about foolishness, picking at each other and just being overly sensitive. Then we ate breakfast. Someone cried because they had too much waffle, Mister-mini cried because he ate his waffle and wanted mine. I shared, and he pushed it away and it landed on
the floor. Mini-Sir cried because he wanted orange juice not grape. Me-mini ate so slowly she couldn’t finish and whined because she didn’t have time to finish. The timer on the house alarm went off, because she had molasses in her feet, she wouldn’t leave the house. Mini-Sir wouldn’t put on his seat belt and didn’t want anyone to help. He cried because he was helped anyway. Mister-mini was fussy because he couldn’t have his sit and scoot train in the car with him. It wasn’t even 8am yet. I needed coffee and prayer. I was kicking myself for asking God to help me with patience because he whammied me this morning and I’m going to need days to recover.
Fast forward to the end of the day when the minis were supposed to be getting ready for bed… Me-mini was refusing to sit in the bathtub. How you’ll take a bath without submerging is a mystery to me. And let’s just say by the end of the night I had to Clorox the bathroom and wash all the rugs…… They all get in bed but no one stays. Mister-mini ended up stark naked and had to be re-dressed several times before the night was done. Bedtime started at 6:15pm. All minis were not asleep until after 10pm. Same game today except we had more stuff on the agenda. Today the mommy-lady was done at about 5pm. After dinner at our favorite BBQ restaurant, I stayed in the car and let the family come in the house without me. Mini-Sir thought it was curious that I didn’t come in. They’ll be asking what happened to me when they wake me up before daybreak tomorrow. They won’t wait for an answer before telling me that they are ready for toys and breakfast. Some days I go eat lunch or dinner by myself. Other days, I window shop at Target. Most days I just go do the regular things I need to do but without kids. I went to Old Navy and Walmart. Then I came home. They were still awake so I went back to the car and listened to a podcast. I came back in the house, wrapped Mini-Sir’s birthday presents, put on pajamas and got in bed.
I met my wife in the fall of 2002. I had just graduated number 10 in the class from George Washington Carver Magnet High School. I sold, and smoked, weed most of the summer. Had never done either before then by I always knew it was there if need be. Although I had a full scholarship to Texas Southern University, I had no idea what I was going to do before the semester started. Nobody in my family had ever been to college. Shit I had only been on campus one time. So I looked around and saw all of my friends had started smoking weed. I was good at math and always had a business acumen, so it made sense for me to be the new supplier. Along with that lifestyle, comes with a lot of other randomness that happen that summer too. Dumb shit.......but entertaining. Maybe I'll share some of that at another time. My friends, this is a love story.
Right before the college semester started, I got a job working at Convergys. It's a call center company. We took Yahoo based calls for personal ads. At this time, Yahoo ran everything. I wanted to be a systems administrator at the time, so I was also starting my career as an IT professional. That's what took me out the weed game which I had never planned on staying in. On the music side I was still battling on my downtime but didn't really see money in it so I didn't take it seriously. My hood ass girlfriend at the time got herself another street nigga when I left the streets. Fucked around and visited her on a lunch break and found him at the house. The square shit wasn't as entertaining as the stories I had slanging 3 for 10's all over the northside. So I'm not really chasing women at the time. I'm focused on being the man.
Overall though, life was headed in the right direction. I have a job in my field, the first in my family to go to college, no kids, and I was gonna be a professional and make paper. When I get to college, I meet black people that were nothing like me. They came from all over the world. And I was pretty much the most hood cat up there. I was new to all this college shit but I had the brains to rock wit the best of them so I immediately became an asset for tutoring. I met this really super smiley chick from Madison, Wisconsin. I was captivated by her. I wasn't in love with her but I needed to be around her all the time because she seemed content. I was NOT content. I was on a mission to change the world and I needed something stable to have my back. She was fearless and was able to teach me a lot about all kinda shit. Like snow. I still was getting over my breakup so I came to college to handle biz. I wasn't worrying about women because this was my only shot. She knew how to cook and I had some money from the job so we made a deal. I buy the food if she cooks it. She also had cable, so I sat at her house all day and listened to the R&B music channel. I didn't grow up with cable. So life was perfect. Go to school, go to work, get some grub, jame some music, go to the hood, repeat. This went on for about 2 or 3 months. Completely platonic domestic relationship.
One day, I invite Tristan Jones, a friend of mine from high school who I didn't know went to the same college, over to her house for food and kool-aid. This was pretty much my hangout spot every day when I had time. Either that, or I was back in Acres Home mingling wit the natives. When we finished jamming music and grubbing, we got up to leave. Right after we got outside, he says, "She kinda cute". I leaned back in the doorway, looked at her, and said "She is huh?" I had never thought about her like that. The next day I came back to her on some "We're either going to be something, or nothing. I'll give you some time to think about it and get rid of whoever you entertaining. But we can't only be friends no more. I'm not going to be sitting over here liking you without you liking me. I'll find something else to do. Do you wanna be my girlfriend?" type shit.
She wasn't sure at first. But she came around. That conversation lead to a 10 year marriage. We broke up plenty of times for various reasons. We survived all kinds of craziness that I might go into one of these days. But HERE WE ARE!! A dynamic 10 year marriage that is full of God, love, trust, collaboration, and a mutual support system from both sides of the family. 3 children later. Only by learning what The Bible says about marriage gave me the courage to marry her. We celebrated this 10 year wedding anniversary during December of 2017. We rented a hall and grabbed our closest friends and family to celebrate. We wanted to show our families that marriage is great when it's done intentionally. Her father was able to walk her down the aisle and "give her away". That was nice. Our friends gave us toasts. The music was awesome and things are great. I hope you believe in marriage the way that I do. I know you may not be used to this much transparency from a rapper but......welcome to my thoughts. You might be doing the math on this relationship. We had 5 years of not being married before we got married. That's when all the crazy shit happened. Gap filled. I look forward to many more years with my wonderful wife.
I would love to hear some love stories from my readers. You can either leave them in the comments or email them at email@example.com under the subject "Marriage Thuggin". I'll post interesting ones on the blog. Happy Valentines week!!!!
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These are the thoughts of a grown ass man from Houston, TX.